There she was, hugging me from behind..

As i turned my head and met hers, it was a scene that lasted. Angelic face, a faint smile, her eyes fading downwards like she's eyeing a bite on my neck..

"Thank you.."

She must had starred from behind for awhile. There i was, in formal clothing, sitting on a stool washing bowls and plates. Her mom was the owner of a hawker stall, and while her two daughters were busy serving and taking orders, i thought i could help by doing the dishes..

"益荣, 放住啦, 哪里好意思!"

Her mom yelled in frenzy. Slightly plump, her frail hair and wrinkled face seemed to be hiding a story. Though somewhat boorish and rough, i knew her mom fancied me to a certain degree. I was so deeply in love with her daughter, and it was obvious she had already given me her consent..

That very night, as i stood beside her bed, watching her sleep, she held my hand.

"Love you dear.."

I gave her a kiss goodnight..

.
.
.

This was when my alarm rang this morning..

It's torturing..
Either let it come true..
Or stop making me wake up from these..

Here, i wanna repost a video.


Maison Ikkoku.
Watched 10 years ago.
One of the most beautiful stories ever..

Ciao.

2012.

The ancient Mayans prophesized a full eclipse in 2009, and it happened. Now, next on the Mayans' list, they suggested a meteor shower or sorts, which signifies the end of civilization. Will it come true as well?

Well, if they are right again, this is how its gonna be like..


Three years is but a short time.
If everything is coming to an abrupt end,
What will you do?

Assuming the catastrophe will definitely occur, it is very depressing for me indeed. 29 years old at most, sanguinely successful with career i hope, perhaps having found the love of my life, the ideas of marriage still far off our minds, which literally means i won't be experiencing the joy of a groom, or the pride of a father..

And i can't be with my partner, till we grow old..

Speaking of which, i just saw 'UP' today.


Such a beautiful story.
Carl and Ellie.
I kinda envy..

And it just irks me even more, utterly infuriated, at how marriages, or even relationships, begin and end these days. I have friends who got into BGRs, for no good reasons, when love is not even present. I have people around me jump into marriages, only to lament months later, laughed and drunk themselves silly..

Sometimes its really funny,
With mixed feelings,
Seeing how people mess up their own life..

Ciao.

Ten things i should have or have not done..

1 ~
Inin. Though she's the one i loved the most, i didn't give her my best, often taking her for granted, and this had became my biggest regret. If only i would persevere right till the end, and not being the first to surrender from our love triangle..

2 ~
I rejected my childhood buddy Qiwei's invitation to Taekwando when we were younger. We could have been good partners, and i could keep my fitness and focus at my peak. It was during poly years, and i thought we were too old to start new. But alas, i should have guessed. It's never too old..

3 ~
There was a night of regret, with a person i couldn't even recall the name. We had fun at the park, at her aunt's place. I left after the shower. I must have shattered her heart completely..

4 ~
Wished i were more mature and self-conscious during my poly years. Three years down the drain achieving nothing but a waste of time. Could have held more part time jobs and complete my Japanese language. Could have done something better to my hair..

5 ~
I still remember the childhood life where me and three sisters play everyday. They're my wonderful neighbours, for a short period. When they shifted away during my primary school days, i was too young to realize. The day they moved, was the day we all lost contact..

6 ~
Shouldn't have taken the $10k loan. Or rather, shouldn't have spent it on worthless reasons and people, and i could have invested the amount for a good return. Its too late..

7 ~
If given a chance to open a steamboat place again, i will definitely personally check the lease. I'm sorry to Ray, that a simple mistake of mine, cost us both $20k..

8 ~
I felt i owe an apology to my poly classmates. We were all so close before, had so much fun. Genting. Hong Kong. But i disappeared, after graduation. When i finally overcame the breakups during army, it was already too late. We had became strangers again..

9 ~
Thinking back, my teachers used to claim i have a knack for arts and music. It's a pity, that i'd long put down my brushes, and gave away my electronic keyboard..

10 ~
The saddest feeling which immerse me right now, is the fact that i'm yet successful with my career, and my mom has to carry on working even though she's already 55..

Ciao.

怀念有人温柔地、用心地、帮我洗头的感觉…
也喜欢一起盖被，一起害怕，一起看着恐怖片…

Does she know..?

听了, 好痛..


Can't help reminiscing the past..
like what 苏永康 sang..
旧爱还是最美..

Mid Autumn.

Amidst a handful of blissful weddings, lie deaths and falling leaves. Contrastingly, I witnessed three weddings and three funerals in the month of September. There were joy of old pals tying the knot, and the bitterness having acquaintances parting our world..

Such irony.

The Chinese believe in Yin and Yang. It is said all entities are represented by two extremes. When there is good, there will be bad. When there is hope, so will there be despair. The rich and the poor, and the list goes on..

I've seen my fair share of extremes at work. The quiet, and the loud speaker. The patient, and the backstabber. The smiling, and the disgruntled sob. The experienced, and the incompetent. The laborer, and the politician. The innocent, and the evil schemer..

Earning just nine dollars an hour, averaging two days a week, it sure seems a little over?

And of course, in relationships, the famous SNAG and MCP. The dangerous and the settler. The high demander and the low self esteem. The falling in love, and the broken heart..

I wish her all the best.

Moving on, the latest book I borrowed is called 'Gold Trading Boot Camp'. At just page eleven, I am already intrigued by the writer's unique experiences at the trading house. Forty-four chapters later, or three hundred odd pages, I believe and expect to see beyond my own cramped world..

If you're interested in trading (commodities, stocks, bonds, etc), reading charts, analyzing trends, anticipating booms, do grab it at your nearest libraries.

Not posting any clip tonight.
Go take a look at the Full Moon.
Happy Lantern + MoonCake Festival Everyone.

Ciao.

I can't love someone i can't Communicate with.

One of the very basic foundation of a lasting relationship, but often neglected. Many chose to go along with feelings, end up in quarrels. Some may last a few years, but without proper communication, all start to fail..

If she doesn't open up, its as good as gone.

As a man, i seriously shouldn't bother with heart matters all the time. There are so many grave issues to tackle, and a distracted mind will only delay the process. And so i've decided, to hell with Love..

Time to be serious.

A stock broking firm wants me to pass M1A and M6 exams. I've put it to thought for awhile, considering the remuneration a remisier gain along the way, with valuable experience and a gateway into the financial world once again. Its my best bet, so far..

Though i'm also considering a full time effort in assisting Ray with his packaging business, which i've failed him personally without proper commitment of my efforts..

Either way, its important i get back on track dealing with what i'm required to accomplish. A career man, is definitely more attractive than a whiner, who always talk about Love..

A nice wedding flick i saw on FB.


One day i'll have a beautiful house,
A wonderful lifelong partner,
And a lovely family..

I vouch for that.

Ciao.

Secret of My Success.

Not all business founders have a silver spoon.
Only a few went Harvard or such.
Some even deep in debts..

61 stories of great names; Bill Gates (Microsoft), Howard Schultz (Starbucks), Toni Mascolo (Tony & Guy), Sir Richard Branson (Virgin Records, and all other Virgin establishments), etc. They are all ordinary people, with extraordinary passion to share.

It is good luck to grab this 2009 edition off the library shelves. I have so far covered three quarters of the book, and am already trembling with adrenaline, having 61 mentors all over the world inspiring with vision and dreams.

I yearn to attain such greatness in near future.
At least I've realized similar traits.
All are self claimed unemployable..

Today is a BIG day for two wonderful person.
A lovely dinner @ Sheraton Towers.
Remy & Alicia's..

Nothing beats watching old friends tying the knot. After such a romantic run of 9 years, so truly inspirational and warm, they are finally walking down the aisle, standing beside the very person they'll love so deeply for life, braving through thick and thin, for eternity..

Here's a lovely wedding clip i digged.


I've always preferred the western style of marriages. A simple meal with the families, the lovely solemnization at the beach, and a fabulous dinner for all friends and relatives, without changing of tux and gowns relating to a fashion display. Best ending with a slow romantic dance, with my one and only..

All the best, newly weds!

Ciao.

Digged this from a friend's.

A Professional Mistake

Your alarm rings, signalling another brand new day. You get up, looking forward for another new day of challenge, another new day to learn. After washing up, you put on your office outfit, giving you that professional look, one that you believe many out there envy. Breakfast follows(perhaps), and you head off to your office. You’re one of the earliest to arrive, ahead of all your superior and when they come in later, they greet you and you feel all charged up for another productive day. Plenty to do and learn and hence, you are prepared to stay back late to do all that is necessary.

If you’re currently doing a degree in finance, accounting or law, the above is probably what you’ve been waiting for all these years. You work your ass off (well… most of you) in university because it’s your dream to join one of those big glamorous firms out there in the market. Lawyers and accountants are the usual suspects for this curse. Once graduated, all of them will run like headless chicken towards those big firms. If you’re an accounting student… you want to be an auditor in one of the Big-4 right?

Well, if you do make it, it’s like a dream come true. In such firms, you get a personal computer, maybe a notebook (wow!). All your stationeries are free, and it’s also the first time you step into a ‘pantry’, where you can make your own coffee, just like those nice offices in TVB series. Next, you get an exclusive e-mail, the domain after your name is not the ordinary @gmail.com or @hotmail.com or @yahoo.com… No, it’s not, it’s your-name@a-big-and-glamorous-firm.com. You can’t wait to tell that to your friend.

Then comes the feeling of giving a business card with your name on it, and it’s not any other business card, it’s one with your name on it, it’s onethat signifies you’re an employee with a-big-and-glamorous-firm. And… the word below your name is not a lowly “accounts executive”… the word below your name is exclusive… the word below your name is… “Associate”. And when your friend gives you the “Wow, you’re an associate with this firm?”… you get into instant orgasm.

3 or 6 months into your job, you will then be experiencing the euphoria of saying… I-am-very-busy… I-have-a-lot-work…I-worked-till-very-late-last-night…I-can't-make-it-for-the-gathering-cos-I-have-to-work-this-weekend. Yeah, it’s an euphoria because to you, it’s a privilege to be busy, it’s very cool to work late, you’re very proud to work in during weekends. When you utter such words, a sense of arrogance and pride radiates from you. You feel great because working so hard means you learnt a lot of things, those not in the professional industry somehow looks lowly to you. You feel big, you feel you’re a level smarter than them. Reality will tend to sink in within 2 years or so, though the duration seems to be getting shorter and shorter now with the younger generation.

First, you will probably ask yourself, how come a graduate like you must do all sorts of donkey jobs such as photocopying, checking invoices, going through piles and piles of documents and filing. You will also be wondering how come your superior whom you once looked up to have to suck up to clients. Oh yeah… most all clients are unreasonable.

If you’re an accountant, you will probably realise that there is no such thing called a ‘balance’ sheet. It’s balanced because you did the balancing act so that your big boss can sign on it and certify it as ‘true and fair’.Yeah… signing on accounts, the job that you once dreamed of… isn’t exactly all a bed of roses. You then realise that you will probably never reach that “just-need-to-sign-only stage” but hey… it’s ok, you probably hate that job by now. When you tell your client something, chances are you are just as blur and confused as them. But you have to act as though you’re an expert because you’re the con-sul-tant. This is just a glimpse of it.

Now, all the late nights and irregular meals will probably cause you to age 8 years in 2 years. Those I-am-very-busy… I-have-a-lot-work…I-worked-till-very-late-last-night…I-can't-make-it-for-the-gathering-cos-I-have-to-work-this-weekend will take its toll on your body and it will show. You will probably look very skinny…or very far… you will certainly look old and worn out. Working late and spending weekends in the office is no longer a cool thing but absolute stupidity. But hey… you will still have to do it, because there’s still much work to be done.

By now, all your friends who ended up as salesmen or doing other things except being a professional, those whom you felt superior to are driving anything but a proton. But for you, it’s time to think whether you should buy a proton cause your perodua is beginning to give you problems. Of course, if your father is a well-connected fella, things can be different. But if you’re not, tough luck. You’ll be wondering how come you’re generally under-paid. Those exposure and learning curve that you once craved for are no longer relevant. You want to make more money. But unless you’re a partner of the glamorous firm, money can be a lil tough to come by.

At this point of time, probably after 3, 4 or 5 years, you finally realise that document (click on this link!) you signed when you first joined the glamorous firm was nothing but lies. Then, you decide to ply your trade in the commercial world, you leave the glamorous firm. You think joining a commercial firm will bring about a good change, not knowing that such a move means you switched from being a ‘profit centre’ to a ‘cost centre’. One of the main effects of the switch is that you will be working doubly hard compared to the profit centre, which probably includes a lot of late nights too… but your salary and bonus is much lower compared to the profit centre. What does this mean… a story for another time.

One thing's for sure… your morning will now be something like…

Your alarm rings, signalling another day… another weekday. You get up, after snoozing the alarm a million and one times. You hope today is Friday, but it’s not, and you feel like shit. You think of a million and one reasons to take MC, but you realised you have to go to office because you failed to finish the report due today though you stayed till 10pm last night. You tell yourself you need to change jobs, just like how you have been telling yourself in the last 1 year. Once in office, you’re in a dilemma cause you want time to go slower so that you can finish your work but yet, you want time to go faster so that you can leave the office and go for lunch.

During lunch, you will bitch with your colleagues about work and probably the bosses. You will all talk about so many people who seem to be doing so well except for you. You realised you should have done something else while in university. You realised you may have made a mistake in life… a mistake in being a professional… you have made… a professional mistake.

True, isn't it?

Now, something to cheer about :)


Ciao.

Days passed like seconds tickin.
August came.
It has been awhile..

幸福是要争取的?

There are times i feel so helplessly manipulated by Fate. Time and time again happiness crossed my path, and yet i can't reach out. Visions of blissful future engulfed my mind, and i know life can be so much more beautiful if i'm given a chance. But no..

遇见, 却又不能与幸福总结?

Watchin her eyes betrayin the happiness she tried wearin on her smiles. Hearin her heart shatterin when the guy she bet all on turned out a scam. Smellin the salt in her tears even when we haven't met. And i can't do a shit..

只不过是个路人..

There are times my heart pounds, prayin she will become my smile. If only life can be a little more merciful and spare two more souls their sorrows. Feel like givin a tight hug, tellin her everything will be fine right now. I'll never let her go..

神啊, 请给我多一个机会吧..

I wanna be in her albums too.
To smile with her.
Forever..

Ciao.

I was down the past few days with serious flu. Skipped a few days of work. Am glad to be back to health..

Seen some interestin sights these days.

There is this old couple who will always visit STC on every race day. While the husband goes around buyin bets and watchin the races in excitement, the wife will be seated at her usual seat, tied. Yes, and i mean with nylon strings, unmovable..

Cruel, isn't it?
I believe that will be most people's first impression.

As i observed along the days, i had a good find. Whenever each race is over, he will be by her side. Feedin her food, wipin her mouth, talkin and smilin to her. And the old lady will just stare blindly into space..

I believe she is senile.
And her husband is always around.
Takin care of her till the end of their lives..

A case of unconditional true love.

It may mean nothin to you, but comparin them to the rest of the uncles who came bettin on horses behind their wives' back, i applaud him way more. Lookin at each and every punter spendin their life and family's money away, i can imagine broken families and huge debts..

Such a pitiful sight.

Worse witnessin the quality of love deterioratin. True love will die along with my parents' generation. And lawyers will be profitin way more from divorce cases than doctors with flus..

I'm seriously prone to flu.
I jog, i swim, i do workouts.
That leaves one remainin factor..

I need home brew soup.

Ciao.

It hurts each time, watchin an old couple lookin back at their precious wedding photos. It hurts so much, because i know, i may not live till 70s, with hair all white, and still have my true love by my side.

Lookin at the quality of love these days, it saddens me so.

你的歌声陪伴了我好多年.
我会一直记得.
阿桑, rest in peace..

"I needa focus."

That was the conclusion i came up with durin my routine jog awhile ago. How i love the slow tour around the neighbourhood at night, passin by the quiet shipyard, the rehabilitation prison, and the park. It provides a reality void for my thoughts to be congregated and provoked. A lifesaver, wheneva i have too much on my mind..

I've clinched the part time at STC. In fact i'm already two days into the job, and it was a rather unusual sight. Though it is troublin watchin the old squanderin their CPF away, i assumed we will all require our own source of entertainment when we are of age. Either way, is finally fulfilled..

Time to move on with my plan.

Here, i'll need to apologise to some of my friends. The thirty minutes i had awhile ago, made me realise how much i had on my plate. All the web ideas, the shirt designs, vendin machines, they ain't actually in my priority list. It is my bad for an easy promise made, which i assumed me being able to adopt easily without doubt. I was wrong..

Haven't had the chance to see you guys in person.
But if you're readin this up.
I am so sorry.

As mentioned right at the start, i will be concentratin. It is my mom's wishes to bring her achar into the market, and that shall be my fuel. What is more satisfyin than fulfillin my mom's life long dream? Not only about her achar, but both her sons' future and well being?

I will work even harder to fill the huge gap my elder brother left behind.

It was only recently i came upon this conclusion: Men born in the year of the Dragon, in their thirties, are all either bankruptcies or burdened with huge loans. All the three person i knew know shit about handlin their financial, and definitely needa work harder on their life.

Here's a little nice clip i saw on facebook.


By the way, it struck me that i'm still pink in health being able to jog and live well. Thank God for everything..

Ciao.

Are you a devotee?

Regardless of whichever God you may have faith from the bottom of your heart, the rest of the content may seem inappropriate or offendin.

The sights i've seen of late, is rather disturbin.

Over the centuries, religion seems to have taken a huge make over. From little churches, we now have infamous City Harvest. From little temples, we now have the flooded Guang-Yin and Dua-Pek-Gong shrines. Needless to mention how other religion fare, for all have their rich grand icons. Buildings aside, even 'devotees' evolved with oncomin trends.

At least the local ones.

Every time you witnessed a pair of ignited incense jabbed into a grave of ash, what do you think is on the owner's mind? "May i tio toto, may i get a good career, may i have a lovely wife/husband, may my kids be the cleverest kid in school", so on and so forth.

Each time a believer prayed to Jesus for their sins, what do you think are their pure intentions? To ask for forgiveness, and promise they'll refrain from committin the same mistake again? Or to just clear their sins, ensurin they'll head to heaven after life, only to sinned just moments later?

And the famous promised 7 virgins after death for another religion.

Has it only occurred to me that religion these days, are mere tools for individual's benefits? That devotees kneeled and prayed, only for their own interests? Where has the love and respect for their God vanished to?

Greed.
A grave human flaw.

I believe in God. I believe God is fair to all human souls. Though life may be merciless for some who were born in difficult times and places, it is indeed our very own will that walks us down our chosen paths, and thus, to our deserved ends.

And I believe God does answer our prayers. When we ask for riches, He will bestow us with riches. When we ask for love, He will give us love. Only a matter of how.

An example, a married man asked for riches to enjoy life. The next day, his wife was crossin the road after groceries and got killed in a freak car accident. The insurance paid a him a huge sum of cold hard money, enough to sustain a comfortable life for the rest of the family..

Well, God did his job.

Ray always told me this.
"God will take something away from you, only to give you something better in return."

So, i am shoutin out loud to all devotees of all religions. Respect your God. Love Him with your heart. Know what is more important to you, family and love, or fame and riches. Do not be selfish. Do not ask for things that are within your own reach. Money can be earned, love can be found, health can be nursed with more exercises and not smokin and gettin drunk.

We humans get too complacent after adaptin to a too comfortable life. Appreciate all the food you can amass at your table. Cherish the very drop of water you can drink. If you think you worked for them, think again. God can just take them all away.

Last but not least,
Ask not what you should not sin.
Instead, seek what you can give.

Anyway.
I believe in God.
Not Christianity.

Ciao.

What a crazy Saturday night.

It was supposed to be a peaceful steamboat and drinkin session, but something went wrong in the midst and the birthday boy was drunk-ed in a record breaker of thirty minutes..

All it took was a bottle of red wine and waterfall.

I had my fair share of guilt makin life miserable for this poor chap, but i believe everything was paid off. Draggin him to the toilet four times and holdin the plastic bag for another four times wasn't funny, though the pub girls were laughin away. Ended up i was the one who drank his excess red wine anyway..

God knows how many times he actually spat on my hands yesterday.

A very big thanks for the rest of the group for makin such a wonderful night. Had it been the same night but with different crowd, it definitely wouldn't have been as fun.

Happy 26 dude!

Well, i was home around five in the mornin. Didn't really sleep well due to the throbbin headache. Woke up around nine, snacked abit for my empty tummy, and went back to sleep. But then i had a really sweet dream on the second attempt. It was a nice under-the-umbrella walk for the two of us..

The weather was rainin when i woke up.

I saw this clip at Jacq's blog.
Thought i would share.
It's lovin..



I am beginnin to desire for something else.

Ciao.

Had my fortune told last night.

The session was done with 紫微斗数, a readin based on mathematical calculations and astronomy, which housed an old history since the dynasties. A readin fit for a king only. Definitely better than poker cards, don't you think?

For a brief description, 紫微斗数 consists of a chart with 12 different chambers, or 宫. They are the 命(life), 兄弟(siblings), 夫妻(marriage), 子女(child), 财帛(wealth), 疾病(health), 迁移(travel), 仆役(friendship), 官禄(career), 田宅(home), 福德(mental or spiritual), and 父母(parents). In these 12 chambers, dependin on the date and time (usually referred by chinese as 生辰八字), various stars will reside in the different chambers. This truly indicates that each person will have their own unique path in life.

The fortune teller is an elegant lady who spent much time explainin each sign to me. Personally, i have always been intrigued by the chinese methods of fortune tellin (eg. 姓名学, 风水), so 紫微斗数 wasn't really foreign. Through her translation of each stars and their purposes, i can tell she is indeed a professional. I really like the way she touched on negative issues WITHOUT any hesitation.

So, as curious as you might be, what did she tell me?

The 紫微 star fell on my 命宫, which means that the main star resided in my main chamber. It was said that most emperors have their 紫微 in their 命宫 as well. Isn't that a wonderful thing? Well, i was mistaken in the beginnin too. With 紫微 in my 命宫, it only means i think like an emperor. Still thinkin it is good? She carried on sayin i cannot be under anyone's authority, always havin the tendency to break free. Like how i always grumble about useless bosses and rather take the riskier entrepreneur route?

How true..

She mentioned i am a believer of late marriage(bingo), will have 桃花运(too many female friends) from 33 to 52. I will be such a great lover to my wife, however things may turn bad dependin on how i manage my 桃花. I think she's goin around the bush that i'll be a really attractive man as i'm older. HAHA.

As for wealth, it is said that i will have plenty. BUT, ample earned, ample spent. It isn't such a bad factor, she assured me, sayin they are definitely not through gamblin or wastin. The money will be well spent. Fine..

She did warn my 22-31 period will be very tedious, thanks to an evil star. When things are comfy, the pillars will fall. Bingo again. All these years, just when i thought i found the right job or earned the right salary, something will happen and take it all away. Like my OCBC job, my cafe, even my personal life. Well, time to work even harder :)

Speakin of evil stars, the infamous 3 in 紫微斗数(七杀 破军 贪狼 aka known as 杀破狼), didn't threaten my life at all. For some good reasons, the arrangement of the GOOD stars in my chart averted their unholy powers, some even tamed and turned positive instead. Such a relief..

Last but not least, she said i am a very friendly person, well liked by everyone. However, there will be some little people who simply loves to stab me in the back. Bingo for the last time. How many betrayals had i been dealt with ever since?

There are alot more details, but shall spare those non curious ones.

Below is a vid my friend posted in facebook.
Let me share with you all.
Pretty thought provokin, if you get what i mean.



I seriously prefer to get stabbed right in front.
Especially when best buddies turn ugly.
Allow me to beat the crap out of him.

Since i'll most probably die of cancer after 62, if lucky.
(PS: my wife may leave before me.)

Ciao.

Why do boys and girls, fall in love?

Do they see something in each other's eyes?
Is it the thrill and adrenaline being together?
Or because of the very same air both draw upon?

There is no universal answer to my question. Or at least, that is my conclusion. But the crisis of couples breakin up and askin me the same old question over and over again, is somewhat exasperatin..

Why did it die?

Love is born from an individual's desire of one's companionship. What kindles the emotion truly depends on different mentalities. Some yearn for excitement, few look towards the future, and the rest, lust. But the truth is, we never much know or really consider our own requirements. Most of the time, we are lured into attraction. When (s)he stands right before us, we know..

And so i would say,
a relationship is formed,
usually in a manner of folly.

"So how do i fall in love?", you may ask.

Long have i pondered over the same query a million times. There was always this same variable from the various love equations i once tried to solve. It is always the same raison d'être why my heart beats.

How do we get to meet,
With such nostalgic feelins,
Out of the many billion others in our world?

The very same truth, avertin my beliefs from strayin, adorin her every vibe, and cherishin every moment the miracle of life endow us upon.

But the irony is, i have yet met my true 6.8 billionth soul.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

Saturday was a massacre.

Out of the thousands of flesh i need to cleave aside for a path to walk, none was rewardin. Seems that the 'most successful' IT fair at suntec was nothin but a gag. I do agree they have the latest and cheapest wares, but it was more about the crowd that puts me off. I'm glad that either there ain't no terrorists or no able ones targettin sg. Such a good spot..

The crowd.


Other than loudmouths yellin prices away in the fair, you get to see huge men bangin everyone in their way. There were wimps who let their gfs pave the path as well. Not forgettin the funniest scene of everybody pushin each other to get on the escalator. Best part is, you need not worry about brochures and catalogs. They were all over the floor.

Such wonderful sights.
And they say sg is a clean and wonderful place.

Eventually, Bryan and i were out of the fair within an hour. Had ice cream instead thanks to the hot weather. Dinner at chinatown with Jean and my part Huixin was a thousand times more joyous. But what i liked most was the tea session after the great feast.

Welcome to the Tea Chapter.


Tea culture is more fascinatin than i assumed. More importantly, the ambience is great, they provide a chance to relax with their zen backdrop or even pleasure from playin little games, all while sippin fragrant tea. It was a great night.

Took a few photos.

Bryan and my part Huixin.


Jean and i.


A little game we played, me owned twice.


A little candid.


Buddies foreva.


I still think i'm not photogenic.
The person i see in the mirror,
is always different from the camera.

Last but not least, let me share a good show i rewatched recently.

「ただ、君を愛してる」


生涯ただ、一度のキス。
ただ、一度の恋。

Ciao.

Took a look around.

A cramp room.
No promisin career.
Depletin saving accounts.

Are those what i've been really fightin for?

It is funny to see where i've landed on these days. Five years ago, i was still thinkin of clinchin a stable job and committin myself to corporate ladders after graduation. But a short two years four months in the army really opened me to reality. My family financial problem gave me a real good insight at my future. I gave a thought about myself, about my family, and decided that i didn't really have much choices..

That day, i made up my mind.

Several bumps entirely changed my life. I took up risky jobs which i thought i'll never ever consider. Had a few stints with property, StarHub, OCBC. Even started our very own cafe after meetin Ray. Never had i worked so hard in my life, spendin every single day in the cafe for months, cookin from mornin till night. And all were lost when a legal issue came..

I curse the landlord for her misdeed.
She bled two young men's dream dry.
All because of greed.

Since September 2008 i have been driftin, on a simple log that may just sink any day. Been eagerly pursuin the way of entrepreneurship, but everythin seems twice as tricky without my old pot of gold. Been meetin up with friends from all fields, rackin brain juice to establish anythin we can both deal with our expertise. But till now it is still disappointin with their lack of enthusiasm. There were ideas, but my partners seem unexcited. Perhaps they are still too comfortable with their predicted future..

Though i had never been much a keen student, it is still a dream of mine to graduate with honours. Without the huge family loan someone piled up when i was still servin my national service, i could be well on my way to university. But studyin became a further route to walk when holdin part time jobs will not suffice. Nevertheless, there will be this day i'll be back to textbooks and notes, like how i've been rackin up library books nowadays..

A wordy post, as usual.
Feels good dumpin all my emotions.
Especially when i'm seriously lost regardin my future..

Ciao.

Best Friend?

Just as i am blessed to have many fine and carin pals, it came to me some nights ago that, i may not have a best friend.

Even though i hang out most of the time, for meals, kopi sessions, karaoke, shoppin, or simply chill outs, somethin still lacks within me. I don't feel complete.

What defines a Best Friend anyway?

Someone to stick to all the time?
Someone of the same frequency?
Someone who stays near enough?
Someone to share secrets with?
Or someone who thinks i'm upmost important..

Now,
To think of it,
More likely i lack a Soulmate instead.

Recent weather had been really playful.

The heavy rains caught me at the right time. Gettin stuck at home wasn't an issue, I fell sick anyway. No flu this time, just goin around coughin like a dog. I am too heated up, yellow phlegm instead of green. I even coughed blood this mornin.

But, its not that serious,
I'm recoverin steadily,
Thanks to all the liang teh that i bought.

I do hope the rainy season will clear away soon. Hardly head outdoors nowadays. Lookin forward to jump right back to my usual joggin and swimmin routine.

Like my new background?
Zettai Kareshi.
Thanks to Jeannie :P

Spent a minute takin the screen shot and fadin the pic. Hope this will do the job, since its easier to read now. No more complaints, alright?

Just Kiddin.

Show you guys what my dream girl will look like :X


Plannin out my future is really a piece of cake,
Because they are all theories.
Takin the first few practical steps, is the real pain in the ass..

Ciao.

Its a little random, but 1am,
And Chu Jialin is still in meetin with her boss?
Good luck, lol.

I've been BUSY!

Friday was spent runnin around the island meetin customers from East to West. All the time burned on trains readin books and travel fares sucked by the Government weren't really pleasant..

Saturday was travellin all the way to Lews' office at Ubi to find out it is really friggin far. Not to mention celebratin Serene's birthday at Down Town East chalet while watchin Lord of the Ring and Legend of the Cordor Hero on tv. Oh yaa, i spent that night over at Lews' office, sleepin in a car..

Sunday was at Lews' office (how many times am i goin to mention this bloke's office?) the whole mornin until i met JingWen for ktv. Had a good sing, but i was so shag i didn't really talk much. She must have thought i am a quiet guy LOL. Anyway we only met for a short session and she left for dinner with her parents. Until next time..

Monday, blues, what else. Didn't reach home until over midnight, had a discussion with Lews again, and Bryan too. Brain dead by the time i got back. But i can sense something interestin is brewin. Hiak Hiak..

Today? The most happenin thing that happened to me was me havin 'chap chai peng' at two totally different places. Still wanna hear more?

Anyway, i just got home from dou hua session. Very giddy now, as though the auntie drugged my supper. I saw my bolster blinkin at me..

Some vids for the Chrono Trigger fans.
I seriously think this lady is talented.
Or maybe she just have too much free time.





My posts lack quality recently. Not sure if you quite get what i mean, but i'm merely postin wadeva that goes through my brain. Not my heart.

And it sucks.

Ciao.

Like my new songs?

I've always enjoyed cantonese songs. Sometimes, they can really bring out some feelins mandarin words failed doin so. Tryin hard to pick up the language, though i seldom get to watch their dramas. Did my best learnin for a few ktv songs..

I still prefer this original version than Wei Lan's.


Speakin of ktv, i just did something really crazy.
My friend and i were on webcam and mics,
Then we sang ktv online..

How silly were we? : )

Today's gonna be a short post, i'm actually dozin off. Had a long day, met two customers from two corners of the island, you can imagine all the travellin i took. Needa rest more for sat's bbq chalet, if there's mahjong..

Let me share a piano piece to make you sleep.


Chances come and go all the time.
Sometimes they slip right through our life.
And it will be many years later, before we'll meet and realise..

So, CHERISH ya?

Ciao.

Happy Valentines.

Spent the whole Saturday noon shoppin. I was late for a minute, got punished to treat Elaine ice-cream :/ but she was nice enough to walk through shoppin malls just to find me some nice clothes, so it's worth it. Imagine i went Zara and Topshop, both lackin the sizes i need? For a moment i thought i wasn't goin to get anythin yesterday..

But luckily Esprit had what i need. Total damage was about 150+, and she gets to sign up as a member straight. Just 2 casual shirts that i kinda need. We both bought a pair of ankle socks each too :)

We met up Bryan for dinner in the evenin after his SATURDAY CLASS.
After dinner, i met up with Lews and SK for tea.
After headin home, accompanied Jeff for his supper again.
Tirin day.

It was pretty funny how i spotted 3 couples quarrelin on the streets yesterday. I mean, of all days? I didn't really have a good impression of Vdays anyway. Every couple seemed so happy, huggin and kissin, gifts and love. But what happens 15th Feb onwards? Back to the same borin routine?

Everyday should be Vday, not just 14th Feb.

0:52 to 1:50 explained the meanin for this song.


Had a really crazy dream last night!

I was at Yishun Dam, with a group of people i couldn't recognise. I stood beside the railings, enjoyin the cool breeze. It was full moon that night.

Then, she just came over and said 'Hi'.

It was a hit off, but i couldn't recall her face.
A sweet and petite girl, her smiles were all over the place.
We chatted and laughed, and took alot of pictures.
And she mentioned her past, i realised her heart had stitches.

Then Jessica came, she seemed to be my cousy's friend.

The next thing i knew, we were at my cousy's place. She was huggin my arm, we were teasin Jocelyn's baby Jomaine. We were huggin and kissin the baby, takin 'family' photos together, then suddenly she whispered to me..

"When are we gonna have our baby..?"

I swear to God, i remember exactly what she said.

I even told her i want twins, and she said i'll need to marry her first cheekily. I asked her if that was a nod if i proposed, then she gave me the shrug action. Jessica asked what we were whisperin about, i told my cousy it's a secret. Then she just blurted out, blushin..

"I want to have his baby.."

OH MY GOD..
I SWEAR AGAIN..
I REMEMBER EVERYTHING..

There were more other sweeet scenes, but i woke up to Laosu's sms shortly..

I think i really saw too many couples yesterday.
Or perhaps i missed my cousy.
Or i kissed the cutest baby Jomaine's forehead too much.

I dunno what went wrong, to have a dream like this.
I haven't told Jessica yet, but i knew she reads my blog.
She's gonna laugh........................................

ANYWAY..

Speakin of marriage proposal..
If you played Chrono Trigger..
Here is a really sweeet vid..


The taste after a really nice dream is always bitter-sweet..

Do you believe in fortune tellin?

Am still seekin someone who is the real deal. A few i've been to, some used poker cards, some only calculated the brief with my birthdate, some asked me too many questions instead. None passed my first stage.

As a fortune teller, i expect them to, first of all, give me a detailed description of myself. If one manage to pin-point all my strengths and weaknesses till the point my jaw drops, BINGO, he/she pass! But again i'll prefer them usin a more professional approach to calculatin, rather than luck with poker cards. 紫薇斗数 is a really popular calculation in hongkong, where the heart of fortune tellin really is. Somethin like that :P

Why tell fortune? Its not like if my life is described like an emperor i can stay home and wait for fortune to come? But i just love these mysterious stuff. Just say that i'm a tad curious about the unexplained. Except ghosts. Supposed to consult one this evenin with KaiLi, but i miscalculated. Ended up with the fortune teller being booked right till March..

This month is a little packed for myself. Shoppin on 14th with Miss Wu, Serene's bday chalet on 21st, a bbq gatherin with Clarence, ST, Qin, and the rest on 28th. It's Ying's bday bbq too on the 28th, but i have already promised my army pals. Sorry, but lets look forward to our ktv next week? =]

Enough of words.
Time to share some songs.

I chanced upon this.


One of my fav from him.


My fav 燕姿 song.


Someone played the piano and sang this for me before..


Love the guitar strings.


From her 2008 album, nice!


Lastly, a really old song.


End of festivals.
May you all have a really great Feb.
Take care, my pals.

Ciao.

Second chances.

Some people never believed they exist. The rest, they just pray hard it will come along one day. How many times have the words 'If Only' rang in your head? We could have all done better, we knew. But it is always durin the aftermath when they will come across our minds..

Life was never like a movie flick. We don't even meet an opposite sex and fall in love with each other at the same time that often, what is the chance of it lastin our whole life time? When a guy likes a girl who didn't even notice him in the show, he'll persevere and eventually win her heart at the end. But, have you always seen it happenin around you? 'Happily Ever After' is only used in fairytales. Regrettably, reality doesn't always share the same endings..

Yet, i believe the world is how we perceive it to be. I believe each of us is unique, and we are all capable of choosin our own paths and do greater good. I believe love is irreplaceable, breakups and falls along the way only makes it more worthwhile. And i believe lookin forward, is all that matters..

Like what i always love to say.
"Since when, is being alive, not enough?"

Ciao.

Met up with my poly mates yesterday.
Here's a few pictures, before you guys complain.

I seriously am a walkin photo disaster.


Forgot whose good idea, me tryin hard to look pervert.


A picture of everyone present that night.


My best photo, don't mind the gamblin queen.


We had steamboat, courtesy of our dear host, Mr LWS. Been awhile since we last met, or should i say, since i've last seen them. They always have a few gatherin along each year, which i've a bad history of playin truant.

And i'm sincerely regrettin it very much nowadays..

I bet none of them knew what actually happened to me durin and after school days. I never told anyone in class. I guess, to my poly friends, i was just havin my periods back then, occasionally mood swingin from time to time. It was really a torture durin that three years, but i am glad, for bein their classmates had already lessened the pain a great deal.

I am really lucky to have met each and one of them..

Ciao.

Just a little story i wrote out of spur.

When everyone else is studyin for their poly graduation exams, a young lady worked extremely hard with part-time jobs while jugglin between school and family. Her name is Jabelle..

Obviously she wasn’t from a rich family, and the same goes for her childhood friend, Albert. They had gone through thick and thin together, includin that disastrous breakup between Jabelle and her first ex-boyfriend of four years. It was hell for her durin that period, and she thanked god that Albert had always been by her side..

“Hey Bert, hows your preparation goin?”

Jabelle was munchin some cookies she bought at 7-11. Every night after she’s done with K-Box at 3am, she will take a long stroll back home at Jurong, and Albert will usually be on the other end of the phone call.

“Ahhh, screw the papers. I hate exams, you know me. Haven’t touched anything that looks like a textbook to me.”

“Haha, you gonna flunk and stay with me next semester? How sweeet!”
Jabelle laughed with her mouth full of cookies.

“Yaa right, fat dreams. Who asked you to miss all semester 3’s papers? It’s a miracle we’re still in the same school already.”

“Do you think I wished for it..”

The atmosphere suddenly grew tense.
Albert realised he had said something wrong.

“Sorry, a slip of mouth..”

“Haa, no worries, got used to it. Stupid Bert!”

“Duh..”

More than a year back, Jabelle didn’t attend the examinations. She was always in her room back then, locked up from the inside, shunnin everyone. The breakup was apparently too intense for her. As her best buddy, Albert was there at her place almost every day. He was always able to calm Jabelle down, something which her own blood sister, Jeraldine, couldn’t manage. It took some time, for Jabelle to be herself again. And it took some time, for her to finally decide..

For the abortion..

“So, you’re home yet?”

“Yaa, just. I’m soooo tired. Aren’t you sleepin? I wish I can sleep at 10am lor, and there you are wide awake at 4am every night. You should be the one workin!”
Jabelle complained as she walk up the stairs.

“Haha, but your side doesn’t need any more staff. It’s not like I didn’t apply.”

“Yaa.. Tommy hired a lot of Malaysian PRs. You’re slow laa!”

“Duh..”

“Enough of your ‘Duhs’. I need my bathe and sleep right now. See you in class tomorrow alright?”

“Sure. Milo or coffee?”
Albert always buys her drinks for mornin classes.

“Milo! Thanks!”

“No prob. See you tomorrow Belle. Nights.”

“Good night.”

After hangin up the phone, Albert jumped unto his bed almost straight away.

*BEEP BEEP*

“Oh ya pal, I didn’t forget. Pass you the present tomorrow ya? HAPPY BIRTHDAY!”
It was a sms from Jabelle.

“Silly..”
Albert smiled, and dozed off..

.
.
.

The results for the graduation examinations came after a few months. It wasn’t pleasin. Jabelle did pass her papers with good grades, and thus able to attend her last semester the followin year. But to everyone’s dismay, Albert failed..

Jabelle has sent Albert a nudge!

“Wasup Belle? Don’t you try to cheer me up too..”

“I’m sorry..”

“Huh? What for? You TOLD my parents?!”
Apparently Albert hasn’t told them yet.

“No.. But I feel guilty.. Always jokingly curse that you’ll retain the semester with me, and it really happened.. Even Jeraldine said I’m evil..”

“Wow, do you always tell her everything? Don’t be silly ya. You said it’s a ‘joke’ already.”

“Haha.. We sisters keep no secrets against each other..”
Jabelle managed to pull off a smile in front of the monitor.

“Well, I have no choice but to see you next year again. Sian!”

“Wei, You’re so bad! But I’m kinda glad.. Thought I’ll be all alone next sem..”

“Well, I’ll be around ya.”

“Thanks Bert. And I’m sorry..”

“Silly..”
Albert smiled.

.
.
.

The next half of a year was smooth. Both of them made it through their graduation after months of hard work. Jabelle was quick to quit her part-time at K-Box and located a full-time job as an IT software programmer in a local SME. And it wasn’t long before Albert will be enlistin with the army..

“So sorry, I can’t take a day off on that day itself. I’m still on probation..”

“It’s okay Belle. It’s the thought that counts.”

“Haha, I’ll send you my photo as a replacement instead. Have you packed? Had everything you need?”

“Yup! Oh man! I can’t wait to see Pulau Tekong! Haa..”
It’s just too obvious Albert is fakin his enthusiasm.

“Haha, cheer up pal. It’s ONLY two and a half years. Be a man, do the right thing!”

“Yaa, right. Two years is a great deal of freedom okay? I can do a lot of shit with it, like watchin Russell Peters. Thanks for remindin!”

“I shall remind you every night! I shall tell you all the lovely things that I’ve done everyday! Haha!

“You mean it? We will chat every night..?”

“Yaa, for not being able to send you off. Hey, maybe I can go over during family visiting day..?”

“But I don’t want to let you see me in uniform! I will be shy..”

“Shy your head laa! Haha!”
Jabelle laughed out loud.

But she didn’t attend the family visiting in the end. Durin the three weeks of BMT, calls between Jabelle and Albert dropped drastically. Every night when Albert tried ringin her up, she would be either too busy with her work projects or too tired. He stopped callin eventually, believin Jabelle will ring him up if she is free..

Well, she was busy alright..

It wasn’t long before Albert realised Jabelle got attached. She met him durin her first day of work, and had seen him daily ever since. He was her manager, the same person who interviewed and hired her, the same person whom she shared meal times with, the same person who knocked off from work and hung out together. It didn’t take much time for Jabelle to fall in love with him..

“George is a really cool guy! Carin, mature, and he always has something up his sleeves!”

“Oh..”
Albert seemed really uninterested.

“Wei, don’t be an arse. He’s a really nice person.”

“Okay okay, I get your point.”

“Hey, why don’t you get yourself a girlfriend too? Then we can both meet up as couples!”

“Is that even a joke?”
Albert rebuked.

“Come to think of it, you haven’t got attached a single time since the day I know you pee-d in your pants..”

“Belle, you promised never to bring it up again!”
That was a dark secret between the two of them.

“Haha! So why don’t we meet up soon? I really want to introduce him to you!”
Jabelle smirked devilishly.

“Yaa we should. It has been ages since you’re WILLIN to meet me.”

“I’m sorry laa..”

“有异性, 没人性!”
It was a known fact that Albert detests such friends.

“Wei..”

They met soon after. It wasn’t a really pleasant day. Albert was much of a sore eye for George, since Jabelle had told him a lot of their childhood stories. Being mad at Jabelle for not meetin up for some time, Albert wasn’t really in his best of moods as well. Worse still, Jabelle is not pleased with Albert’s cold treatment against her beloved George..

That day was a disaster..

“Grrr, I hate Albert! He is so not a gentleman!”
Jabelle, whinnin to Jeraldine durin bed time that night.

“What happened to him?”

“Aiya, I was thoughtful enough to arrange a meet up between my boyfriend and my best friend, but all Albert did was givin attitude! I know I didn’t meet him much over the months.. But he didn’t have to be that petty, right?”

“Haha, at least you did realise you didn’t meet him for a long deal of time. Don’t forget you missed his family visiting day as well. I will be pissed if I’m him.”
Being the elder sister, Jeraldine always seemed more mature.

“But.. But..”

“But you have been too blinded by love, sis. Have you forgotten how he had stood by you all the while? Just because you think you found your love of your life, doesn’t apply that he deserved such cold treatment from you. Isn’t him your buddy for life?”

“You’re irritatin..”
Jabelle was hit at the bull’s eye.

“Yaa yaa, I know I’m naggy. Not a big sister for nothin. I don’t wish to jump to conclusions, but hasn’t him shown more care than anyone else? If he’s older by a few years I would have snatched from you lor..”

“Haha, you two can always have a 姐弟恋!”

“Shut up. I’m already attached.”
Jeraldine’s turn to get hit.

“…”

.
.
.

A few months passed and the two good friends were still not contactin each other. For Albert, it was as usual. Long had he got used to a life without a text or call from his best friend. He did think back bout the past at times, and it always ended with a sigh. Good times never last..

His phone rang one day, a message from Jabelle.

“Can we meet..”

When Albert saw Jabelle below his block that night, he sighed again. She was in tears. And when she saw Albert walkin towards her direction, she couldn’t help flingin herself at Albert. She cried loudly on his shoulders..

“What happened..?”

“He lied to me.. He promised me so many things.. But they won’t happen..”
Albert wiped her tears off her cheeks as she whimpered.

“He is married..”

“WHAT?”

“I found out today.. His wife came..”
It was then Albert realised Jabelle had a bruise on her cheeks.

“DID SHE DO THAT TO YOU?!”

“She didn’t make a really big ruckus.. Left after tellin me off.. Tellin me never to meet that guy again..”

“Have you called him..?”
Albert realised his temper won’t do any good to the situation.

“Yeah.. He told me he’s plannin to divorce..”

“…”

“Bert.. Should I still believe him..?”
Jabelle eyes were so swollen..

“I think you already have an answer in your heart, Belle..”

That very moment, Jabelle locked her arms around Albert and gave him a deep hug.

“Bert.. You’re my best buddy after all..”
Jabelle smiled with tears in her eyes..

.
.
.

She stayed on with George.

But not without resistance. Her family was totally against the idea of her being a third party. Even Jeraldine had a big quarrel and fell out with her. Not being able to withstand the pressure, she moved out in the end. News eventually caught wind, and all her colleagues knew bout the affair. Everyone shunned Jabelle like plague..

Everyone, except her best friend..

“Why didn’t you try to convince her?!”
Jeraldine probed Albert when they met up.

“You know she wouldn’t listen..”

“I only know she’s doin something gravely wrong right now, and you supported her! It doesn’t seem like you to be so short sighted!”

“…”

“Now everyone is mad at her, are you happy?”

“Jerald.. You know her more than I do.. The first guy she had almost drove her crazy.. If she gives up this time round, she won’t recover..”

“You’re tellin me that it’s right to break up someone else’s family instead?!”

“I only know she loves him a lot.. Too much, to give it up altogether.. If she believes in him, I believe in her.. Shouldn’t you support her too?!”

“My little sister, is really blind..”
Jeraldine sighed..

“She always sees the bad guys..”
And starred at Albert with tears..

“Haa..”
Albert smiled..

.
.
.

It really wasn’t kind on Jabelle. Though independent, stayin alone wasn’t an easy feat, especially durin such a period. She even changed her job to avoid gossips. Missin the warmth of her family, she often broke down and cried. George stayed with his kids and wife. He didn’t accompany Jabelle much..

“How’s your new work place?”
Albert asked while browsin through his list of mp3s.

“Not too bad.. At least I get to use the Internet..”
Jabelle had grown so much thinner and fragile since..

“Well, I can’t wait to ORD from the army months later. It’s so sickenin to get stuck in there for five days a week!”

“How I wish you can meet me every night, Bert..”

“Well.. You can always call me?”
He was tryin hard to divert her attention.

“And I neglected you durin your BMT.. I’m so sorry..”

“Wow, that’s like almost a year back. No wonder they always say never offend a woman, they remember everything..”

“Haha..”
Jabelle managed a fade smile.

“How come.. You never once asked bout George and myself..?”

“Hmmm, am I supposed to?”

“Aren’t you curious how we were getting along..?”

“Belle, I believe in you..”

Jabelle smiled again..

But in actual fact, things were rather bleak. It had been almost two weeks since Jabelle had met George. It had occurred to Jabelle that he had started avoidin her. The usual calls and messages turned almost zero. Deep inside, she knew she was goin to let her best pal down..

“Don’t make yourself at home, alright? It’s not the first time you messed up my room!”
Albert shouted, before enterin the bathroom.

“You better don’t peep at any of my stuff while I bathed!”

“What’s there for me to peep at, little boy? Your new boxers? Haha..”

“I-r-r-i-t-a-t-i-n.. Give me five minutes!”

Jabelle smiled to herself. Lookin around, except for a few new posters on the wall and a shelf full of books, Albert’s room didn’t change much at all. It was exactly the same as she first stepped into his place, when they were still so young and naïve..

“Like room, like owner.. Haha..”
Jabelle thought.

As she started fiddlin through his stuff, she realised it had been a really long while since she last visited his place. When they were younger, she used to come over almost every other day. Memories. Just like the birthday present she bought him before the graduation exam. As she flipped through the old wallet, she became playful and tried to empty it, takin out all his cards and cash.

Suddenly, Jabelle froze. Tears formed up in her eyes as she became overwhelmed with feelins. She put everything back into order and placed the wallet back to its original position.

“So, did you mess up my room…. Huh?”
Albert realised Jabelle was already gone when he came out..

.
.
.

As Albert darted out into the corridor while donnin a decent piece of clothin he grabbed within his reach, his mind was at a blank. Deep in his heart he knew something was dead wrong.

“Belle! BELLE!”
Albert yelled at the top of his lungs as he saw Jabelle runnin across the street.

It wasn’t long before he caught with her.

“What happened?!”

“Nothin, just leave me alone!”

“NO! Tell me what happened, or I won’t let go!”
Albert was losin his end as Jabelle turned cynical.

“Why are you always such a BUSYBODY!”

Albert couldn’t believe his ears..

“George told me everything.. That you went to look for him and told him off.. That he should break up with me if he doesn’t love me enough.. Now that he had avoided me for two weeks already.. ARE YOU HAPPY?!”
Jabelle blurted out as she cried.

“THAT BASTARD!!”

*PIAK*
Before Albert knew, Jabelle had given him a really tight slap.

“SHUT UP! Who are you to interfere with my life? My life is bad enough, I don’t need a busybody to make it any worse!”

Albert stared at Jabelle with a hand on his left cheek.

“I don’t wish to see you ever again.. Just.. Leave me alone!”
Jabelle said her last as she freed away from Albert’s softened grip.

As she ran across the road, Albert was seen chasin behind her.

“NOOOO!”

.
.
.

It had been two weeks ever since. Jabelle didn’t get to see Albert at all. As she sat on the bed thinkin, she had really begun to regret her words. She had the urge to see Albert more than anyone else right now..

“How are you feelin today?”
Jeraldine asked as she stepped into the room.

“Jie. I’m much better, I guess..”

“Dad.. He is still rather stubborn..”

“I understand..”
Jabelle knew deep inside that her father won’t forgive her so easily.

“So, hows the packin?”

“There wasn’t much to begin with..”
Jabelle looked around the room and prepared to leave.

“And George..?”

Jeraldine knew George didn’t visit her even once durin the two weeks. She knew somehow, it was over between her sis and him. And she was kinda glad Jabelle was able to take it with ease..

“He didn’t come at all. I guess that is his answer..”
Jabelle replied with a smile.

“Sis, I’m happy for you.. I know it wasn’t easy..”

“Thanks Jie..”
The two sisters gave each other a hug.

“Hows Albert..?”

“He is okay, still the same..”

“I see..”

The room went dead quiet for awhile.

“Are you goin to visit him now..?”
Jeraldine asked.

“Yeah..”

“Com’on, lets go.”

As Jabelle stood up with the help of her sister, she reached for her clutches and started walkin towards the door..

Albert was admitted into another hospital. That fateful night, as Jabelle started runnin across the road, he saw a sports car approachin along the curve. That was when he yelled at Jabelle, and pushed her hard across the road. She suffered a broken leg as she fell hard against the pavement. And Albert..

“He hasn’t woke up yet..”

Albert’s mom told Jabelle. Even though she was really mad with her initially, but had calmed down much as time passed. She and her husband saw Jabelle grew up too, and they knew, that their son was brave to save his beloved childhood friend.

“I’m so sorry..”
Jabelle broke down in tears again.

“It’s okay Jabelle.. It’s not your fault..”
Albert’s father tried hard to ease her guilt.

“You two, take care of Albert for awhile alright? Alice, lets go buy some food..”

“But I’m not hungry..”

“Dear, you still need to bite something..”
Albert’s father said as he caressed her head.

When the parents left, Jabelle took the seat beside Albert and held his hand..

“I wish you’ll wake up right now..”

“He will, soon.. If only he knew that you had got over George for good..”
Jeraldine mumbled to herself.

Jabelle starred at her sister for awhile.

“Nothin..”

“Jie.. I think I know..”

“Hmmm?”

“I saw something, that night..”

Within the old wallet that Albert kept for years, was yet another gift about the same age. Kept inside a secret compartment he had carefully hidden, was a photo. The very picture of Jabelle and Albert whom were secretly snapped by Jeraldine durin their school days. The very picture Jabelle gave Albert before he left for the army.

“You saw the photo?”

“You knew all along?!”
Jabelle was caught surprised.

“Of course. I took that picture, remember?”

“But..”
Jabelle was still in disbelief.

“Sis.. There are a lot of things you didn’t notice..”

“…”

Jabelle starred at Albert for a moment. It was this familiar face that had always been around her, showin up each time she needed him most.

“Jie.. How long did you know..?”

“Since day one.. Have you forgotten how he had always wanted you to be the bride instead of me? It’s not because I’m older..”

Everything came back as Jabelle sought through her memories. When they were still kids, Albert always had to play with Barbie dolls at their place. And whenever they played 家家酒, he would choose Jabelle as his wife, and made Jeraldine the kid instead..

“Sis, I’m sorry I kept this secret away from you all these years. Since now you had finally realised, I guess it wouldn’t hurt to break my promise with Albert..”

“…”

“You know, when you first got together with Ray durin your secondary school days, this little brat actually came to me and cried..”

Jeraldine ruffled Albert’s hair as she continued to narrate.

“Can you imagine how his heart cracked each time you told him bout your happiness or sadness with that guy, and with George..”

It suddenly dawned on Jabelle that Albert was always uninterested about her two boyfriends.

“Do you still remember those days when you’re workin at K-Box?”

Jabelle nods.

“Why do you think Albert always stayed up late every night until 4am?”

“…”

“He has always been good with his studies. So, I gave him a really bad scoldin after his results were out, when I knew he failed on purpose.. He planned it all along, to accompany you for half a year more.. He didn’t want you to be alone..”

“…”

“You can imagine how disappointed he was when you couldn’t make it for his family visitin day.. But you definitely didn’t know he had to sacrifice his parent’s tickets just for you.. He was all alone that day in camp, when everyone else had love ones visitin them.. I was on the phone with him that whole night..”

“…”

“Sis.. The day when you told him you were pregnant with Ray’s kid, didn’t you two hugged and cried the whole night? Didn’t he promise he’ll protect you and stay with you all the time? He kept his promise all along, you know.. He still is..”

Jabelle had already broken into tears ..

“Albert, I couldn’t thank you enough for savin my stupid sis’s life, over and over again..”
Jeraldine starred at Albert and smiled with watery eyes.

“Bert………”
Jabelle cried while holdin his hand tight..

Deep in her mind, memories of Albert flooded. All the sacrifices he had made for her since the very beginning, she could imagine now, the pain and heartbreaks he had gone through, yet puttin on a strong front each time, workin even harder to cheer her up. That was the love he had for her..

“Bert, I love you..”

“Silly..”

.
.
.

Jeraldine’s boyfriend proposed to her at the end of that same year. It was an happy occasion, on top of the fact Jabelle had moved back with the family, and her father had forgiven her. Brushin all the past aside, she returned to her cheerful and hardworkin self. But on the weddin night itself, she wasn’t smilin much. Because Albert wasn’t around..

“Reve, have you been takin good care of my Jie? Remember to let her bully without complaints, it will make your life easier!”

“Idiot.. You don’t want your gifts already huh?”
Jeraldine grumbled with her hubby beside, laughin.

“Wei, you promised to buy me those durin your honeymoon. You can’t go back on your words!”

“Let me think about it.”
Jeraldine replied cheekily.

“Did you buy anything for Albert..?”

“Yeah, help me pass him alright? Tell him I’m sorry too, that I didn’t make it back on time..”

“I’m sure he’ll understand.”

.
.
.

As Jabelle stepped into Albert’s room once again, she felt it was so much neater. Compared to the past where she had to clear away books and papers just to take a sit on his bed, it certainly helped with a lady doin the tidyin up. As she saw the old wallet on his desk, her eyes turned watery once again..

“Silly, are you gonna cry again?”

Jabelle looked up, and there he was, standin at the door.

“Nothin, just thinkin bout things..”
Jabelle replied as she walked over and hugged him.

Albert woke up from his coma that day. He claimed it was Jabelle’s voice that brought him back. It wasn’t long before he recovered fully and reported back to army, missin Jeraldine’s weddin night due to army duties. Jeradline was on honeymoon and was too late for his ORD celebration.

“Sorry I made you went through so much..”

“Silly.. At least now we’re together..”
Albert kissed her forehead as she smiled.

“Hey, I wanna hear you say it again..”

“Thanks for always being there for me..?”
Jabelle replied the wrong words deliberately.

“The other one!”
Albert blurted.

“…”

“…”

Jabelle paused awhile and gave Albert a little kiss.

“I’m glad I’ve met you..”

“…”

“Bert, I love you..”

“Belle, I love you too..”

.
.
.

The End

Tonight, there will be no waves of text.
What i'll share, is a vid i happen to chance upon.
Perhaps, you will enjoy it as much as i do.

Trailer of 'The Secret'.


I'll add an additional clip of Larry King interviewin Oprah, bout her past encounter with the elements of 'The Secret' itself.


It does make sense.
The winnin tile always come durin MJ wheneva i'm wishin hard.
And bad things always happen to Jeff wheneva i prophesize.

After all, the world is how we perceive it to be like.

Ciao.

Feelin dejected..

No, i'm not depressed due to the fact it has been 6 months since the breakup. Ever since we went our seperate ways, life has never been more colorful. I had my taste in businesses, and friends became dearer than they already were. But still, there is this huge gap in my heart.

It is the lost of confidence in love..

Take a look around. Aren't close friends or relatives been breakin up one after another? Aren't couples bickerin over insignificant and irrelevant matters? Aren't divorcin, once a taboo among married pairs, becomin too much like a trend?

Aren't the quality of love been stoopin to a new low..

The thought of true love has escaped most minds these days.
"Should i not love her wholeheartedly, in case i go in too deep and get hurt?"
"Should i continue to be with him, even though i know there's no future?"
"Should i accept this r.s, because there isn't anyone more suitable?"

What nonsensical questions are those, seriously..

Why is today's love based on so many new variables other than just love itself? Since when its charm alone isn't enough to last the few decades? Please tell me that being with the person one's heart desires is still the best thing that can ever happen?

Why has it deteriorated so steeply..

I am losin faith. Gravely doubtin my chances of meetin anyone who still agrees with each passin day. Humans these days love only for physical factors. Looks, sex, money, accompany. The list goes on. Who still loves for the 2 original reasons?

She doesn't even have to be as perfect.
Just a HEART who is still willin.
And a SOUL who still believes that,

True Love,
Is bout doin anything,
To love and be loved,
Right till the end..

Ciao.

HAPPY 牛 YEAR!!

So much for bein missin these few days. Its the festivals period, pardon me! Been doin alot of mahjong and gatherin and mahjong, if they mean the same. I'm still on my winnin streak, oh somebody stop me!

Just kiddin before i start losin ^^

Not an avid gambler, been playin 10-20 cents only, you do the maths ya? My best triumph was only 9 bucks in a round. The funny part is they usually went to pizza deliveries. Oh well, its all in the name of fun?

CNY, as usual, chu1 to my grandma's. It is the same annually; payin respect to my one and only grandparent, waitin for all the late-comin 叔叔 & 姑姑 to arrive, a short Q&A bout not bein attached or married, end of session. The fact my father's side meetin only once a year made us as close as strangers, and its funny to recognise their faces but not knowin any other fact. Not that i'm interested anyway.

Chu2 is the essence! Not only there were lotsa loud adults, you'll see kids screamin when they didn't get their rightful cards/tiles too! Its like 40 people crampin into a normal HDB flat with mahjong tables and lotsa poker cards around. Welcome to my mom's family, WE ALL LOVE EACH OTHER! Nobody will ever feel out of place here, gambler or not =P

Surprisingly, i didn't gamble this year though. Sat through the whole mahjong session between my aunts, its the clash of the champions! Oh ya, they never once bothered usin chips. Cold hard cash, baby? You'll see lotsa red and blue notes flyin around. Thats the authentic game man, haa!

Even now i'm still rather tipsy with all the bottles of red wine between my cousys and 长辈s. Its gonna be a goood night slumber..

Oh yaa, you guys have been complainin bout the lack of photos here. I AM a photo takin person, even if i suck at it, but bad news, i can't locate my connection cord! So currently, all the photos are stuck in my mobile for good. Too bad.

Thats precisely why i've been sharin youtubes instead..

I saw this on tv!
Rather moved by his singin.
Eli Mattson.


New year, fresh start.
There will still be unpleasant events occurin.
But we ought to learn to remain cheerful at all times.

Ciao.